Wednesday, May 30, 2007

a good day

That's what it was. Accomplished lots of little things AND got lots of good news.

Accomplishing lots of little things (too many of them so trivial to even list) means crossing off items on my ever-expanding and never-ending to-do list. How rewarding. So just for today, I'll dwell on what I did and not what I still need to do. Will worry about those things tomorrow ;)

Lots of good news means a good jolt of happy juice for the soul. That little baby boy is doing much better and they are talking about him returning home this coming week-end. Yeah!

After months of agonizing about which school to send the twins to next year, I finally reached THE decision. Was kinda forced into it, but sometimes that's a good thing. The deadline to order uniforms for one of the school choices was today. SO I dragged the twins there tonight after school. Their first time in their new school ever. The first person we ran into there was their current teacher, which immediately put them at ease. She was there to get uniforms for her two boys who go there as well. baby boy and baby girl were ever so patient and cooperative trying all sorts of garments to figure out sizes and helping me fianlize the order. And "Oh. My. God." how cute they were in those little uniforms!! Gave them a quick tour of the school and we all left happy, me mostly, finally having reached a state of peace of mind over this issue. And that is definitely good news.

Last, but definitely not least, the news that TWO of my bloggy friends (you know who you are) are pregnant. One big yaba-daba-doo ( a la Yogi bear).

Yep, all was well with my little world today.

And I just had to stop watching the Sens play, I had no more nails left to bite...

Monday, May 28, 2007

need prayers

A friend of mine gave birth to her fourth child, a baby boy last Thursday, 4 days ago. He was 2 weeks early but still weighed 6lbs 6 in. He went home after two days. He has now been back to the hospital for the past two days fighting for his life. He has meningitis. Please pray that the antibiotics he's on work and that God doesn't decide to take this little soul away from his family. Extra prayers for the parents, the pain they must be going through is inconceivable.

Sunday, May 27, 2007

I did it!

I participated in my very first organized race at age 45! And I loved it. Actually, I could be hooked ;)

It was only a 5K walk/run but being at the start line with 6000 others, getting the encouragement of onlookers all along the route and the thrill of crossing that finish line was phenomenal and invigorating. I went with two other ladies, a decade or more younger than I. We started off running and then had to stop as one of them got a cramp in her chin, I stopped as well and made sure she stretched and walked gently till she felt better enough to go on. I encouraged them along and said we were doing this together and we were going to finish this together. So it wasn't my personal best time but that didn't matter. We had a blast. Especially the sprinting for the last 200 meters.

After the race, we went to a friends house to shower and change and headed to a surprise 40th b day party. Two coolers later, I was feeling no pain and was quite happy ;)

Friday, May 25, 2007

nighttime ritual

As parents, one of our biggest challenges with little ones, is getting a good nighttime routine going that works effortlessly for everyone. When big sis was little, we had a hard time getting her to settle. Was a combination of traumatizing months of intense colic and new parents who didn't really know what to do. I remember lying on the floor next to her bed waiting for her to fall asleep...and me waking up a few hours later, stiff and still dressed. We eventually figured out, pure trial and error, that she would easily fall asleep on her own only IF music was playing in her room. To this day, she is still like that. I'll go check on her in the evening and she's sound asleep with Evanescence or Maroon 5 or whatever she's into lately blaring in her room.

With the twins, things were easier. A combination of more experience under our belt and the fact that they were together in the same room. I don't exactly know when this particular ritual started or how but it works, so we've just kept doing it. And will for as long as I can because it is just too precious.

Every night, I have to tuck them in, make sure that they have some water on their nightstand and say/do the following in this particular order, no deviations allowed:

"bonne nuit"
"buenas noches"
"hasta manana"
"i love you"
"big hug"
big hug

I walk towards the door, turn off the lights and say as I close the door "see you tomorrow"

and that's that :)

Thursday, May 24, 2007

a yay day

Love that term dani!!
I for one, definitely had one.

Went with the twins to their last field trip of the year to the Experimental farm. The kids had been studying farm animals for weeks and even witnessed chicks hatching in their own classroom. So they were psyched. And so was I :)

From boarding the big yellow school bus and singing all the way there, following our guide around from here to there and marveling at the beauty of baby animals, having moments of intense mother's pride when MY little ones would ask smart well-thought out questions or blowing us away with their answers AND having warm little hands holding mine all the time. It was wonderful. All of it. Moments to cherish.

In the evening, went to big sis first soccer game of the season (a mixed team of 12-13 year olds). Hubby is coaching so the twins and I sit on the sidelines. Couldn't get over how much the girls have grown over the past year! Big sis looked like a giant out there compared to the younger girls. Was a great game, great plays, great weather. A blissful suburban evening at the park followed by ice cream treats :)

Looking forward to many more days like this. They're the ones that make the gloomy ones vanish into thin air.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

the long week-end

THE long week-end in May. Kind of a yearly Canadian rite of passage. The official onset of the summer season which for winter logged folks like us Canadians is a big deal.

Ours was OK. Basically nothing went as planned so we had to go with the flow. And for a control freak like me, its unsettling and puts me in a weird place. Don't like it.

The kids had been invited to a birthday party on Saturday, but the mom moved it up to the Friday as most of the kids had a PD day anyways. So this saw me scrambling last minute to find gifts.

The pool guy was supposed to come on Saturday to open it up. The kids had been counting down the days on the calendar for weeks. He called in sick. Postponed by another week. Didn't help that some friends called and gloated that THEY went swimming over the week-end, kids were perturbed. Great. So we set out to buy their trampoline instead and installed it a few weeks before anticipated. They certainly had fun with it though.

Friends were supposed to come over for a BBQ and watch the Sens game. They canceled last minute. Bummer. Kids disappointed. We still had the BBQ, stuffed ourselves silly and the Sens won which was awesome.

On the hormonal front, things are better. I'm giving her some space and we now talking more maturely and politely with each other. Feels so much better. Went out with her to a show this week-end, very nice mother-daughter time. Three 17 year-olds from her high school are magicians/illusionists and put on four sold-out shows over the weekend at a local high school. It. Was. Incredible. They are truly professionals in this field and put on a performance worthy of seasoned artists.

Having everyone here over 4 days made me realize how little "me" time I'll get over the upcoming summer. My exercise routine will go bonkers for sure. So Saturday, after hubby came back from his golf game (yep, he golfs 3 times every week-end), I finally headed out for my walk. I mapped out a 5K course around here and set out with chronometer in hand. I signed up with some friends for a 5K walk happening next week-end and I've been working on decreasing my time. Listening to my MP3, I was reaching my halfway point and quite happy with my time so far, when out of the corner of my eye, I saw this little mutt of a dog run from this house, cross the lawn, cross the street and before I knew what was happening, he bit me on the back of my right ankle and wouldn't let go. The owners who ran after him, grabbed him and asked if I was OK. I was in shock and mad "your dog should be on a leash, he bites!" Good thing I put on some socks that go up higher so he actually bite through them. I finished my walk, Told hubby what happened when I got home. He was furious. Called the city and within half an hour, City By LAw and someone from the health unit were here. Filled a report, they took pictures of the bite mark, told me to go get a tetanus shot. They paid the owners of the dog a visit and put the dog in house quarantine and assured me that he had up to date vaccinations. What an ordeal. Now they want to know if I want to press charges...they can get ticketed for over $600 for biting and over $100 for running off its property. Hmmm, still pondering this one. Still can't believe how fast they responded. They do take this stuff seriously.

Then Sunday afternoon, hubby tells me that with all the excitement of Sens and bites and all, he forgot to tell me he invited this couple over for supper. What? An old friend of ours who remarried and coming over with his new wife. A little weird as we also keep in touch with the first wife. Thank god for wine, it compensated for the lousy meal as I didn't have much left around the house to come up with anything extravagant. Still, was nice to see him happy in his new life.

So with all that, my gardening is way behind. Weeds are taking over as we speak. Better go pluck some...

Thursday, May 10, 2007

the hormonal front

I don't know how it started. I don't really know if there was a triggering factor. Guess it was more of an escalation. But next thing I knew, big sis and and I were not talking to each other. Lasted for a good 3 days. Very long 3 days that saw me melt in tears at night, profoundly hurt, a hurt like I've never felt before, feeling at wit's ends about what action to take, feeling like a parental failure. Her attitude and bad mood just rubbed off on me and put me in a bad mood too.

I am not ready for these teenage woes.

Whatever happened to my sweet little girl, always cheerful and loving. She's still there, I'm sure, but is overshadowed by this grumpy, lazy creature, who grunts at everything we tell her, or rolls her eyes, or tells me to "leave her alone" or "I don't fell like talking anymore" or "whatever", who doesn't feel like doing anything or going anywhere. You can see the depression and anger setting in but you can't do anything about it cause she won't let me into her world. So I've let her be, as hard as that was. Gave her some space. And hopefully she'll snap back. Seemed better this morning.

Thank God for friends. Quite a few heard me vent out loud these last few days. Including my mom who was quick to point out how I went through similar mood issues, which of course I don't remember. Do moms become dumping grounds for teenage angst? Are they great kids everywhere else but become vicious at home?

At first she really made me mad. Made me think of her as a spoiled kid with no appreciation for all that we do for her. I was actually starting to hate her. And that's a strong feeling, a scary feeling for a mom. I really didn't feel like getting up in the morning to make her breakfast and lunch. Felt like teaching her a lesson and letting her fend on her own. But mom's guilt took over and I didn't end up there. However, today, when the cleaning ladies came, I told them to not bother with her room. I've asked her to tidy up cause they were coming, She didn't. So I wasn't going to. I made a pact with myself to no longer go in there and let her live in her own mess.

And hubby in all this? Well, she's all nice with him unlike me, which makes me feel even worse. At first, I didn't bother him with it cause he is having enough trouble with female co-workers these days. But when I finally approached him, he figured it was no big deal. I was blowing things out of proportion. I think men just don't get all emotionally tangled up like we do.

Thank God also for my 5 year old twins who are still filled with unconditional love and endless supplies of hugs for their mom.

Sunday, May 06, 2007

cornucopia of thoughts

Sunday morning, we're still all in our jammies the kids are watching cartoons, hubby is off golfing (yep, another season of being a golf widow has started), a few minutes to myself and maybe I can jot down this myriad of thoughts I've been wanting to blog about. So here goes, in no particular order.

The Senators won last night, yoo hoo! The excitement in this city is just rising. Same in our household as evidenced by hubby's new purchase...

Bought the kids a fancy ass basketball net. Took a few hours to put together (arghh) but oh so worth it. Loads of fun for us all. Next, we are getting a trampoline from Costco have a spot set aside for it. It'll be their end of school year present and should ensure hours of enjoyment over the summer months. Doesn't seem like we're going anywhere this summer, so convinced hubby to use this as an alternative. And we are working on getting the twins to ride their bikes on two wheels only. Will keep ya posted!

Soccer season is just around the corner. Hubby is the head coach of big sis team and has already been busy with several meetings and coaching clinics. Baby boy just can't wait to get started, he wears either his soccer uniform or Sens jersey DAILY and is hooked to the sports net channel. Too funny. So apart form soccer and all the activities around the house, am also working on other activities for the kids for the upcoming summer. Am keeping the twins in their gymnastics and they are actually "graduating" from recreational to pre-competitive level. Big sis wants to pursue some horseback riding as in the past and am encouraging her to register for her Bronze Star in swimming. AND, hubby has finally agreed to let her go to a sleepover camp. She's been to this same one with school last fall and will be going with a friend of hers whom we really like. I think it'll be an awesome experience for her, 6 days and 5 nights in the outdoors, canoing, pitching a tent, rock climbing and such and NO screens of any type and NO mom to pick up after her.

Have been involved with several of big sis school projects lately. We are deep in the story of Tecumseh and the War of 1812 and the life cycle of butterflies. She has to hand in a written report and do a class presentation. And boy have times changed. Whereas I had a manual Smith Corona with the "a" not really working and having to use white-out for typing errors and leafing endlessly through the dictionary, we are now in the world of computer and word processors and spell checks and googling for texts and images and automatically translating some texts. And her presentation? All in PowerPoint. Had to buy her the software along with a 2GB USB Flash Drive last week as all the other kids seem to have it. And this is only 7th grade. I shudder to think what's up at the university level now.

Went to an open house at one of the twin's potential schools for next fall last week. As I walked around and saw all the projects displayed, it dawned on me how I'm still in a honeymoon type of phase with them. The visualization of endless hours pouring over homework and school projects with 3 kids hit me hard. As well as the anxious feeling of still not knowing a 100% where to send them next year. I'll just keep agonizing :(

My mom, who is 83, has been under the weather lately. Nothing specific, just an amalgamation of many little symptoms. She's loosing her general will to live it seems. I don't deal well with that. I try to get the kids to cheer her up with little drawings and phone calls. Being an only child, the weight of my parental responsibility is getting heavier. As compassionate as I am in my nature, I don't deal well with old age for some reason. I worry endlessly of loosing one parent and seeing the other one alone as they are together ALL the time and have a very small circle of friends and NO relatives. Ah well, one day at a time. Springtime will cheer her up some I'm sure.

As for me, I'm still going to the gym at least twice a week and walking or biking when I can. I'm definitely stronger and can feel that my endurance has increased as well as my energy levels and am sleeping much better. However, I have to admit being discouraged with how slowly my body is changing its shape. I just can't seem to get rid of my midriff bulge and its driving me nuts. The trainer is not motivating me much lately either. I really have to concentrate on my diet as its obviously the major culprit. I'm going to have to be more radical in my choices, not an easy feat and my will power wavers like the wind.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

i'm back!

WOW! Nearly 2 months since I've been here. Where has the time gone? Since some of you asked and even anonymous people were concerned with my relative disappearance, I finally put some time aside today to get here.

I've been a victim of life in general, nothing bad really, just trying to keep up with it all.

My last post saw us on the verge of our trip to Florida. Seems like eons ago already. It was a most wonderful family getaway filled with loads of warm memories. Started off with four days at Disney (Magic Kingdom, Epcot, MGM and Cape Canaveral. Highlights? The rides, the parades, the fireworks, the magic, watching kids in awe, new experiences, learning new things, everyone getting along, great weather, meeting up with friends (6 adults and 10 kids), glad that the twins were old enough to appreciate and remember and have the stamina to keep going. Downfalls? the crowds, the lines, the expenses, being a prisoner of Disney, kids getting lost (scary for all), camera battery dying on me. After 4 days we all definitely had enough and looked forward to the rest of our trip away from the crowds quietly and leisurely filling our days with swimming, biking, tennis, beach, favorite restaurants and a chance to see our hockey home team play and win. Baby boy at one point summed it really well for us: "I wish you and dad both stopped getting older so that I could catch up to you and we can keep doing lots of fun things together"

But then it was back home and the vortex of everyday life sucked me right back. Took a week to put things away from the trip and then all of a sudden Easter was upon us with all the preparations that entailed including relatives staying over. Then tax time crept up and having to deal with a new accountant who had me searching for all sorts of info in the depths of my banker boxes. We also put our mountain condo up for sale so more frantic search for documentation. Throw in there weekly sessions at the physical therapist for a shoulder injury, meeting my trainer weekly and trying to keep up with my exercise routines. Add to that a half dozen birthdays to attend, field trips, school projects, parent-teacher interviews, trips to the library, getting new couches for the family room, getting started on soccer season, doctor's appointments, putting away winter stuff, taking out summer stuff, cleaning the yard, watching playoff hockey games and lets not forget the usual cornucopia of household chores. And there you have it. Life of a busy mom just trying to keep it all together. I'm indeed just hanging in there.